All Your Fault
by mrs.sakura.hatake
Summary: Sakura falls asleep on a mission and wakes up a prisoner. Pure KakaSaku silliness


This is for the KakaSaku Pirate Week prompt Walk the Plank on Tumblr and was lovingly beta'd by Yummy Foods.

Sakura couldn't believe her eyes. She had fallen asleep on the beach, perfectly safe knowing her partner is on watch, and now she has woken up on a pirate ship.

_Pirates? Are pirates even a thing? This __**cannot**_ _be happening._

But it _was_ happening. Not only was it happening, but she had no chakra.

_Why don't I have any chakra?_

It was then that she realized she was in chakra cuffs. _How do pirates have chakra cuffs?_ She pulled at the restraints behind her back. These weren't just chakra cuffs; these were her own chakra cuffs.

_I am going to kill him_.

"Kakashi!"

"Hmmm," he hummed behind her. She felt him shift. They were back to back.

"Are we really on a _pirate ship_?"

He had to feel the anger rolling off of her. It was radiating in waves. "It looks that way, Dear."

"And are these _OUR CHAKRA CUFFS_?"

He wasn't sure how to respond. Afterall, the answer was just as obvious to her as it was to him. But he knew his wife well enough to know this wasn't a rhetorical question. "Yes, I believe they are."

"How would pirates get our cuffs?"

"I assume they searched my pack." Again, she probably already knew this.

"Why did you bring chakra cuffs on our mission? We were just supposed to be vaccinating children, and doing check ups! Why would we need chakra cuffs?"

He didn't know how to answer. At this point he was just going to stick with honesty. "I brought the black box. I guess they found it in my pack after I passed out."

"You...you brought our _toy box_ on a mission? Wait, you were on watch. How did you pass out?"

"I was planning to stop at an inn on our way back. I already arranged a couple extra days off with Naruto, and let the hospital know. Your mom agreed to watch the kids for two more nights. I was planning to take you to Roykan."

"Where we had our honeymoon? That is so sweet." She relaxed a little behind him. Then she thought about her question. "But you didn't answer me. Why did you pass out on watch?"

"Mah, that's not important now, Sakura. Right now what _is_ important...is them."

Sakura had been so lost in her conversation she hadn't paid any attention to the audience that was gathering around them. She turned and saw a crew of what to be to be at least twenty men. They looked exactly like every caricature of a pirate she had even seen. She decided to address the one with the biggest hat. If anyone was wearing a hat that large it had to be for a reason. She hoped it indicated he was the captain. "What do you want with us?"

He smiled at her. His teeth were yellowed and uneven. Dark hair framed his sun-withered face, and he fixed her with cold, dark eyes. "Right now all I was is for the two of you to SHUT THE HELL UP."

Kakashi decided that was his cue to pop in. "Well, that isn't very nice. Really, if you didn't want us to speak you should have separated us, or gagged us. Is this your first time taking hostages?" He still couldn't see Sakura, but he could feel her exasperated eye roll. "And I passed out because I had exhausted my chakra."

Sakura was stunned by this. "We were walking, not even pushing hard. How did you exhaust all your chakra?"

"Nine days ago I started a challenge with Gai on who could go the longest maintaining the first inner gate. Apparently 8 days 19 hours is my limit."

"Why would you do that when you knew we had a mission? This has been planned for a month."

"I can't turn down a challenge. I really thought the whole think would only take four or five days tops."

"This has to be the stupidest challenge he has ever given you. Do you even know how dangerous that was? I cannot believe you were dumb enough to accept it." Her voice held no amusement.

Kakashi swallowed hard before responding, "It was my idea. My turn to pick the challenge." He waited. She wasn't answering. The pirates all looked rather shocked. She must be making the _you are so dead_ face. He knew that face well. He was surprised the captain didn't register the danger that face indicated.

"I thought it would be over quickly, and it wouldn't require ridiculous handstand laps around the village like last time. Remember how mad you were about that? You told me it was unacceptable behavior for a kage, even a retired one."

"So you came up with the ridiculously dangerous challenge to keep from embarrassing me?"

"Exactly!"

Sakura's patience was wearing thin. Her voice was strained as she continued to interrogate him, "Has your chakra restored at all?"

"Well, not yet. But I bet Gai didn't last that 8 days 19 hours. I hope he didn't. I am only one challenge ahead right now. If he wins this one, we'd be tied up," he said matter-of-factly.

The pirate captain felt it was time for him to intervene. "In case you haven't noticed, you ARE tied up. And you don't seem concerned about that. Can you tell me why that is?"

Again Kakashi chose to answer him in his most confidant voice, "Oh, that's easy. Because she's here." He tried to turn to Sakura, both to indicate who "she" was and to gauge her reaction. He could feel the annoyance radiating off her. She wasn't angry any longer, just annoyed. He would like to keep her there.

"I am not doing anything. You got us into this mess. You get us out!"

"That's not entirely true, Sakura. It was your idea to sleep on the beach. Something about the waves being relaxing. You should've woken up. They were in our camp long enough to go through my pack, and somehow get the chakra cuffs on you without you waking up. A kunoichi shouldn't have slept through all that." As soon as Kakashi finished speaking he knew he said too much. She was flying right passed angry and heading to pissed.

"Hatake Kakashi, are you seriously suggesting that _YOU _falling asleep on guard duty, on a mission, is somehow _MY_ fault?" Her voice was stern and sent fear into everyone there. Kakashi thought he might have seen a couple of the pirates take a half step back. He wouldn't have blamed him. They could see the rage in Sakura's face. Only a fool would underestimate an irate Sakura.

The captain, it seemed, was a fool. He leaned forward, close to Sakura's face. "I don't give a damn whose fault this is, you are both going to stop arguing right now!" For added measure he slapped her. Now, the captain may have been a fool who had no idea what he had gotten himself into, but his crew seemed to be a bit wiser. Kakashi noticed of the twenty or so men who had been standing behind their captain, only eight remained. The others were all slowly slinking below deck.

"Now are you going to get us out of this?" Kakashi assumed the captain's actions would make her forget she was mad at him. He wasn't that lucky.

"Absolutely not! I am just adding that to the list of things that are _YOUR FAULT!"_

The captain was stunned by their response. It was as if he wasn't there at all. "That's it! I am done. I don't care how much the bingo book says their bounties are, I want them off my ship. Now. Off. My. Ship!"

Looking around, Sakura immediately saw a problem with the pirate's declaration. "Um, Captain, we don't seem to be near a port?"

"Then I guess you will just have to walk the plank." For the first time the captain seemed to be enjoying himself, obviously unimpressed with the antics of his hostage. He just wanted to be rid of them.

Kakashi couldn't help but goad her a bit more. "Sakura, did you hear that? They are going to make us walk the plank. Naruto will be so disappointed if we drown. You should really commence with the saving us part."

"I will not. This is your mess. You fix it!"

"How am I supposed to fix it? I am still worn out from using all my chakra. Hate to say it babe, but you're the only one who can get us out of this."

The captain had truly had enough. "I said off my ship." He turned towards the few remaining crew members on the deck. "What is the problem? Get them off! NOW!"

A few men rushed forward, pulling Kakashi and Sakura to their feet as another pushed a wide plank out over the open water. The pirates began pushing them in that direction.

"Sakura, we both know you can release the Byakugou Seal and break those cuffs. That's why we use them. So just release the seal and get us out of this mess." He didn't sound cheeky anymore. Just tired of the game and ready to get out of this situation.

"Admit this is your fault," she countered stubbornly.

They were halfway down the plank now with one very nervous pirate pushing them along. He saw no other option. "Sakura, I am sorry. This was all my fault."

She smiled and released the seal shattering the cuffs on her wrist with a metallic clink. The pirates who remained on the deck backed away. The one who was on the plank took one look at her seal and jumped into the water.

"Kakashi, be a dear, and grab our packs. Make sure the black box is still in there." She was adjusting her gloves. As an afterthought she added, "Oh and the vaccines too." They did need to complete their mission after all.

She looked at a very young man. Really not much more than a boy or 13 or 14. "Secure us that boat." It was a small craft, but it would return then to shore. The young boy rushed to comply, much to the captain's displeasure.

"Why are you giving the orders on my ship? Why are you following her orders? There are only TWO OF THEM. THIS IS MY SHIP!"

"Captain, I would advise that you abandon ship," Kakashi sassed. With that he threw their bags into the small craft that had been lowered for them and jumped off the ship.

Once Kakashi was clear of the ship, Sakura scanned the horizon. She turned to the boy who lowered the boat. "Is that where you picked us up?" She asked indicating with a point.

The boy seemed unable to speak. He opened and closed his mouth but no sound came out. Finally he nodded.

"Thank you." With that she jumped up and slammed back into the deck. With one chakra-laden punch the ship shattered beneath her.

She skipped across the water, joining Kakashi. "Now we are half a day behind. You better figure this chakra thing out because we are going to push hard to finish on time. I don't want to miss any time at Roykan. And you need to get me a new set of cuffs."

He smiled at her, warm and loving. "We can go shopping together. We got those cuffs on our honeymoon, after all."


End file.
